Puzzlement over Words
by GraviityReflectedInGlass
Summary: 'And soo I the beastly of all Tac- Erm.. I mean Clyde. Is going to confuse the minds of others! Hahaha!-Damn! I'm about to be late for English'
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Well…This is a bit awkward since I haven't been on this account. But alas. I decided to write over my spring break. Sooo enjoy~

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><p><strong>Puzzlement Over Words<strong>

_Chapter 1_

"Hello. Out there whoever you are! I would like to present myself as you probably know. I am Clyde Donovan! The sexiest beast in the whole neighborhood!- Ouch! Hey! What was that for?" I yelled when I felt something hit me on the back of my head. Mind you that hurt. A lot!

"Your too fucking loud Clyde. Shut up."

Well then. See how people are rude. Hmph! Might as well just shut up and see what they do. Ssh let see what happens. "…"

"…"

"…" Its working! He's cracking. I can tell.

"…"

Ladies be patient and-

"Dude?"

"What? You told me I'm too loud and to shut up. So I'm shutting up." I the beastly beast say as a matter of factly. If that's a word but hey who's checking?

"Fuck. Clyde your such a dumbass."

I gasp. How dare he say that! I'm not a dummy. Am I? I'm just a little slow….and dense. Well enough of that! I figured I'd confuse him with my words and teach him not to call the Beast of Taco!-uh I mean Clyde Donovan! A dumbass.

"Oh Token, Token, Toke."

I see him looking at me confuse. Got his attention finally.

"I. Clyde Donovan. Am not a dumbass. I just have a slight tiny slowism."

"What's a slowism?" Time to explaiiin~Bear with me people this might be funny.

I clear my voice like in the movies where a boss is about to mention something very important.

"It means the mind of a person who's been thinking too much and can't figure the words of either others that are telling them. Whiiiich means! Understanding the words many are stating of what confuses the minds of the youth!"

"That doesn't even make sense." My dark friend says.

Grinning I tell him pointing at his face.

"Now look who's the dumbass one."

"Wha-"

_**#RIIIIIIIIIIIING!#**_

"See ya later Token!"

And soo I the beastly of all Tac- Erm.. I mean Clyde. Is going to confuse the minds of others! Hahaha!-Damn! I'm about to be late for English!

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><p>AN: So If you guys enjoyed this little piece ^(Sorry if its short) Review and I'll continue it. But seriously or Clyde will confuse your little youthful minds with his words .Just kidding If you're wondering…I have no idea what I was writing on his little explanation but oh well I find it amusing. Soo let me know what you think. ;)


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: It's Craig's turn. Now let's see what happens. Sorry its short. I'll rewrite it sometime soo enjoy!

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><p><em>Chapter 2<em>

Next Day~

Well if you must know…Token punched me on the shoulder..Hard. It still hurt! Damn I didn't think he'd be mad about that. Sighing I walk to the bus stop. Ugh look at the sun! Look at all the happy people! Look at the bird-Shit! That one almost pooped on me. Eww! Anyway back to the topic.

"Oh how I positively absolutely despise the morning!" No really its full of shit!

"We don't give a fuck if you hate mornings Clyde"

"No body asked for your opinion! Craig!"

Craig as you all know is a bastard to me. Yeah you guys all thought we were like best buddies? Well he thinks we are when I don't consid-

"Did you just say 'body'?"

Oh this could get interesting…I yawn pointing my index finger towards his nose glaring at him since everyone knows I have a bad temper in the morning.

"You got a problem with my language Tucker?"

He just stares at me blankly while I stare dully at him. Man I'm really tired. But the show must go-Why am I moving? And why are my eyes close? Aw man I'm sleep walking!

"Shit. Clyde!"

I hear him calling me. But seriously man..I'm beat. Let's all see Craig's face shall we?

Uh oh. He doesn't look happy.

"Clyde are you fucking nuts?"

I can't help but laugh. Haha! He said nuts!

Craig looks at me like I'm crazy but I point it out to him. Grinning

"That's a body part Craig! Congratulations!"

Craig just glared at me but before he could say something or hit me I ran inside the bus.

"You fucking asshole." I heard him mutter and I pointed at him still grinning.

"That's another body part!"

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><p>AN: I don't think this one was amusing. Hehe anyway review and let me know what you think.:)


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Clyde doesn't get anyone this time but next time I'll think on whoever he'll get. So on with the next chapter. Enjoy!

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><p><em>Chapter 3.<em>

"Clyde Donovan. You're up."

It is 11:40 and I am still tired. Oh and remember about that incident in the morning? Yeah uh I got double punch on BOTH my shoulders! Soo much pain man. Just touching them will make me wince in agony. Damn you Craig!

Anyway as you all know. I have to explain about my in this little assignment that horrible teacher. Yes I said horrible. Because I like saying she's terrible. Any who! Time to present you *drum roll* …me talking all smart. This should be good.

"Difference in personality, values, attitudes, moods, and emotions help explain why some people behave the way they do. I receive many compliments about my personality. Some examples of compliments I hear are that I'm honest; I am responsible, and fun to be around. These are traits that express who I am. I can tell I am honest because I can mostly be honest to people I talk to or hang around with. Mainly I can be honest around myself of many things. I can tell because when I talk to my friends I am really honest around them as much with many of their conversations. As for example if some of them need an honest answer I'll give it to them with all my honesty."

'_Dude. This is fucking LAME! I hate reading out loud.' _Just look at her smiling. Smiling. Oh how I hate her smile.

"I can tell my personality is being responsible because of many things. For example I can be responsible on taking care of lots of things as being responsive to myself, around others, and also I can be responsible around in my family."

'_Now that was a lie'_

Great now she's clapping. I look around the classroom and to my surprise I see all of them shocked. Hey I may have a slowism but I am very good with my words. Isn't that right? …Thought so.

"Clyde that was excellent!-"

'Oh thanks horrible lady.'

"Now everyone! We will all do a survey."

'_What?' _She can't be serious. I hear everyone asking questions. But really? A fucking survey? I'm toooooo tired!

"Don't worry. No one will know that it was you. Its all anon." She says all happy as she's passing the papers.

Ew. Even when she's saying something nice she's horrifying.

'_Someone get me outta here!'_

"Alright everyone. Start!"

'_Stupid bitch.' _Let's just get this over with.

When is the last time you wanted to punch someone in their face?

'_Well here's something you don't see.' _

Hm. like a few seconds ago.

When did you last receive some money?

Yesterday.

What are you craving right now?

_**Tacos! **_

'_Wait. That is sooo obvious it's me. I'll just put..'_

Food.

When was the last time you cried?

'_Son of a-'_

A week ago for being so pissed.

'_Which is true. My mom didn't want to buy me tacos instead she bought be fries.'_

Sexiest thing you've experienced in the last year?

'_Last year? Uh nahh nothing happened.'_

Nothing.

What do you drive?

I'm not legal!

What is your favorite key ring on your key chain?

'_Who's carries a keychain?'_

Don't have one

What is in your pocket? _'Whoa! That's a little personal But if they want to know…Its my-'_

Phone, money and my keys.

Where do you hurt? _'What? Are they psychic or something?'_

My shoulder and arm.

What is your favorite aisle at Tesco?

'_What's Tesco?'_

...uh.. Huh?

What kind of milk do you drink?

Chocolate.

What are you going to do after this?

'_I'm getting ticked off. This survey sucks.'_

Don't know.

Who was the last person you went shopping with?

Friends.

Do you have the same name as one of your relatives? _'Pfft! Like someone in my relatives could really have my sexy name.'_

No.

What color is your bedroom? _'This is stupiiid!'_

Red.

'_I think.'_

Has anyone ever mistaken you for a family member?

No.

Does someone like you now?

'_How the fuck should I _know_?.'_

Don't know.

Do you like the color green?

No.

How many hours did you sleep for last night?

'_Really? Are they trying to torture me! These questions are retarded. And last time I checked was…'_

uh.. 10 hours?

'_Well when your sleepy you can't really think and remember well.'_

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

'_Someone's thinking about me? Well I am awesome sooo..'_

Maybe_._

Do you think someone is talking about you right now?

'_Blehh I don't care.'_

Don't know

What were you doing at midnight last night?

Sleeping.

Do you think you're approachable?

'…'

Not really.

Do you regret doing anything this week?

Nope

Name an obvious thing everyone knows about you:

'_Obvious?...I don't know. I'll just leave that blank.'_

What are you craving right now? _'That's easy.'_

SLEEP.

What side of the bed do you sleep on?

'_They torturiiing me!'_

Right.

Would you rather feel pain or be numb? _'…'_

Numb.

How's your heart lately?

Beating.

'_Duh! Man how long is this?'_

What were you doing this morning at 7AM? _'Haha now that you mention it.'_

Something.

What are you missing? _'My Beeeddd!'_

Home.

_**#RIIIIIIIIIIIIING#**_

'FINALLY! Lunch Tiiiime!'

"Have a nice day!"

'Yeah yeah stupid bitch.'

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><p>AN: I'm sure for anyone who ever goes to school feel like this ^ But hey that's how schools are. Hehe. Review~


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: So to whoever is reading this! (which I doubt since I only got 2 reviews but 3 favs and alerts, thanks btw.) I believe it is Kyle's turn! This fic was just made for fun/boredom. It really isn't serious but maybe someday it might get turned into a story or who knows~...Until I get an idea. ^^. Anyway onto the next chapter enjoy!

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><p><em>Chapter 4.<em>

_**Lunch.**_

"Yay! Foooooooooooo-Ow! What the heck man? I already got punched on the shoulders! What are you tryin-OH…Uh. Hey Craig, Toke-"

Man do they look pissed!...Haha I said pissed. Like if they peed their pants. Anyway! Back to what's happening!

"Shut it Donovan. Or else you'll be going home with a black eye."

*Gulp*

Aw shit. I think I swallowed my food too fast! But hey, you would do the same when you'd see their faces it's fucking scary.

"Hey! It ain't my fault you guys take my shit serious! Fuck guys you always take them serious. Although you never realized that I'm trying to confuse you! Chill!"

If looks can kill I bet I'd be dead any second now. But seriously! It was just a joke! You guys know, right?

"Well if it was _just a joke_. Why don't you try to _confuse_ Kyle eh?"

I saw my dear dark friend Token smirk.

Confuse Kyle? Um…Oooh that's such a toughy…Oh but I do have one but I don't think he'd like it.

I think Token and Craig saw my confuse face.

"Well it seems you don't want to confuse Kyle which means we won. Now Clyde-"

I saw Craig take my burger while Token grabbed my can of soda.

"I believe these are ours."

"Hey that's mine!"

Shit. Now they're both smirking!

"Either do it or we'll have to eat your lunch every single day."

Pouting I whined. Yeah you guys can call me a baby or whatever but hey! They are talking about my food. Which means my tacos….My precious tacos.

"Fine!"

Damn bastards. Let's just hope Kyle doesn't take it serious.

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><p>Oh how I hate being the center of attention. Craig and Token are smirking. I scowl at them.<p>

*sigh*

But alas I must do this. For I the beastly of all Tac- Um..I mean Clyde. Is still going to confuse the minds of others!-Anyway let us get back to what I am about to confuse Kyle Broflovski shall we?

Oh well let's go. Or how Mario says it 'Let's a go!'

"Hey Kyle!"

Great that got his attention. Well let's just continue.

"Think you can read this?"

"Sure Clyde. What is it?'

"Well someone told me about this word and I'm a bit confuse with it."

I showed him the paper with the word and I saw his face from normal to slightly horror?

Damn I didn't think he'd have trouble with it. I mean he is the smartest kid in class.

"Uh Clyde are you sure this is a word?"

"Of course it is! Tell me did you figured it out?"

C'mon smarty say it!

"Um…Is it 'penis land'?"

I think I might have just died on that! Hahahaha. Tell me you guys expected that?

Next thing I know I see Kyle glaring at me.

I slowly started backing away. Damn he's even more scary than Craig and Token.

"What. Was. That. Word."

I replied quickly.

"Penisland! No it's uh…Pen is Land!-Wait! It's Pen Island!-Yeah that's the word!"

His glared deepened.

Damn! C'mon Clyde think of somethin-Ah ha!

"Oh would you look at the time."

"For what?"

"It seems it's time for me to run from my death! See ya later! Penisland!"

"Douchebag!"

He did not just call me a bag of douche did he? Smirking at him I made an excellent remark. Aren't I great? ... Fine don't answer!

"For the record I'm not a Douche or a bag! Or a Bag full of Douche!"

Ah I love peoples' confuse faces! It's soo funny.

"What the hell are you talking about Clyde?"

And here I thought he was smart. Everyone he is not!

"It's called compound Kyle! Use it! Some words aren't really the actual words! Ciao!"

With that I ran leaving our dear Kyle in a confuse daze.

"Sonofabitch..."

I heard him mutter and I pointed at him still grinning.

"That's Cartman. Not me."

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><p>AN: Funny...I updated on my Birthday. ^^. Happy Birthday to me~. Hehe Review~


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